40

I was going to write “everything is on hold” but if that were true I wouldn’t be so tired.

My dad is still slipping away and, if I’m lucky, I’ve probably got a few more weeks left to talk to him. Time to ask questions, hear some new stories and maybe re-visit some old stories. Mum is in better health but there are problems with her too.

If everything were on hold then there wouldn’t be the many phone calls and letters to deal with, or indeed the seemingly random ability of a person or persons to change so much in 24 hours.

As ever, I am just part of the whirlwind of helpful people and services. But, since this is my blog I can come clean and tell you... I’m sad and tired. And let’s not forget frustrated. There’s an expanding head full of musical ideas that isn’t getting emptied and hardly enough time to get the oud out of it’s case.

But it isn’t all bleak. One of Freya’s well meaning friends asked me how I was.

Me: “I’ve just been to see my dad.”

Freya’s friend: “Oh, he’s not well is he?”

Me: “No.”

FF: “I think he’s going to die soon.”

Me: “I hope not!” Freya’s friend looks disappointed. “You wouldn’t want your daddy to dies, would you?”

FF: “Well... he is 40.”