Am I getting old?

Well, my eyesight is getting worse, I'm a bit run down and I've torn the cartilage in my knee and get regular physiotherapy (with an operation in the offing). But, my eyesight has been far from 20/20 since I was seven. I'm a bit run down because I'm an older father of young children. And my knee? That didn't wear out because I spent too  much time bending down to pick up the remote control; I busted it during a stupidly showy off yoga moment.

But still, the question hangs in the air. I have the distinct impression I have passed a point in my life where my I can't pretend to be young anymore. That's physically young, mind you. I refuse to become a grumpy old man and fight with my contemporaries who have begun to do so. Modern life in not rubbish and there were far more frightening things around in the past. Just watching Top of the Pops form 1976 is enough to confirm that. I listen to new music and although modern pop can sound derivative and shallow I will just have to refer the honourable member back to Top of the Pop from 1976 again.

Music, which has saved me in the past, keeps me going. As do my children, friends, chess, art in general and that strange itch to see what is coming next while desperately trying to live in the moment (yes I know it's  cliche - but it's still valid).

What has happened though, and it feels like a recent change, is an appreciation that I'm closer to the end than the beginning. This is not meant to sound maudlin, which is why I described the feeling as an appreciation.

Anyway, can't stand around chatting all day. I have things to do...


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