Duck Calmers

Over the past few months I have been receiving emails from people in reply to an advert for my double bass. Only two of these have been genuine. The rest have been attempts to defraud me by offering a cheque for more than the value of the bass. I am supposed to send back the excess, which, I guess, is supposed to tempt me with the chance of some extra money for nothing.

I was getting fed up with this until I decided to fight back. Rather than reply with essays on the short term value of defrauding others, I had some fun. I have been responding with questions about why they want the bass, what they might do with it (many of them seem to have no idea what a double bass is) and whether they would like to buy something else from me instead. I have been offering Boofers and Duck Calmers. I have no idea what these are but, strangely, Duck Calmers seem very popular. I have just had an offer of $1,200 for one.

The problem is, the defrauders now want photographs. I'm tempted to send pictures of something that 'could' be a Duck Calmer and see what happens. Does anyone have any ideas what image might pass for such an imaginary fowl tool?

More on this as it happens.


Sid Smith said…
I don't know how to link images here but surely this item might qualify as a duck calmer.

I always wanted a double bass but cash flow being what it is at the moment I might just have to settle for a duck calmer.
Will said…
Perfect! I'll send it off and see what happens.

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